1. I would love to be a demolition derby driver. I have it all planned out. My car will be pink, my number on the car 24, and my driver name will be Candy Apple. I have my whole alter-ego worked out! You think Biker Babe might be my alter-ego? No ma'am, it's not!
2. I am very perplexed by this spoon. I have one in my drawer. Please tell me, why do you need a spoon with a whole in the middle of it? What purpose does it serve that a regular spoon or even a slotted spoon cannot accomplish? It is driving me nuts!
3. I have a glass eye.
4. Just kidding, I don't have a glass eye. It was just very random, even if it wasn't true!
5. Professions I've aspired to throughout my life, other than a demolition derby driver: firefighter, doctor, truck driver (I thought it'd be so cool to travel across the country and get paid for it), teacher, nurse, social worker, juvenile detention teacher/counselor, NBA basketball player (notice I didn't say WNBA, I wanted to play with the men!), rock star, orchestra conducter, and finally, mommy.
6. I had a super-huge crush on my college math teacher. He was probably in his late 20's, early 30's at the time. He had long, red, fuzzy hair that he pulled into a ponytail, a goatee, and wore Birkenstocks all the time. He even had a beer belly. Looking back I realize that I definitely liked him for his brain. He was passionate about math and life. Anyway, my roommates and I found out where he lived and basically stalked him, totally in a "I'm not a crazy, I just want to know what he's like outside of school" way. One time we were sitting outside his house debating whether he had a girlfriend or was gay when he walked out. I screamed and ducked. Stupid me, the window was open so he heard and looked our way. I was so embarrassed. After that, everytime he called on me to answer a question in class I turned bright red. Not too obvious, right?
7. I love doing my taxes. I know, weird. Of course, my life is uncomplicated enough that I don't need tons of forms or anything. But I love calculating things out and I love filling out forms.
8. Since I wasted a number with the whole glass eye thing I thought I'd share another random fact. I don't really like chocolate all that much. I hear a collective gasp! I mean, sometimes I get a craving...but not often.
5 comments:
I am laughing out loud right now. The glass eye is perfect randomness. Oh, and where were you that you didn't even have running water? I think that is the most random. even KOA's have water, you must be super extreme.
The spoon with a hole in it? I have an answer and you must see "Nightmare Before Christmas" to understand it fully. Basically, you've been held hostage by some mongrel, you make poisonous soup (with worm's wort) and you feed it to your captor. He's in on your trick and is immediately suspicious, so you whip out your holey spoon and eat it yourself. Only the soup drains through the hole and you're not poisoned. Genius... reminds me that Spouse has life insurance.
In kindergarten we had a girl with a glass eye. We were taking our "rest" time one day when the teacher exclaims "Oh Dear! Jackie's Eye fell out - no one look." I didn't dare look. And to this day, I don't know how it fell out.
And I get that your "no running water" comment was random. Did you have to kill your own meat and forage for berries too?
You don't like chocolate? Can this be true? I am very afraid, I wouldn't know how to exist without it. As for your math teacher, well, I am totally with you on the whole nerd thing, I married one. Love it.
I am relieved to hear that someone else shares my similiar lack of interest for chocolate. I always get weird glares when I chose a gummy bear over a Hershey's Kiss.
Biker!???? I really miss your optimistic view on life. And I miss reading your blog. HOpe you are okay, or just traveling somewhere exotic.
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